Erectile Dysfunction and Your Partner

No matter how you choose to characterize it - erectile dysfunction, impotence, just not being in the mood - ED can be devastating to the relationship between partners. However, with some basic communication skills and creative thinking, you can not only reduce the adverse effects but also turn it into a positive method for discovering new methods of sexual expression.

The first thing to keep in mind is that honesty and communication are essential. Trying to cover up erectile dysfunction as simply being "too tired" or some other excuse can lead to your partner feeling rejected. In fact, that's the biggest danger of covering up impotence with what you might think are harmless lies. Your sexual partner invests some measure of their identity in being attractive to you, and if you simply push them away that identity becomes eroded, and can lead to further problems down the road.

A better strategy is to let them know that they are attractive, sexy, and that you are excited by them - regardless of the erectile dysfunction. It is useful for both partners to remember that impotence is limited to one area of the body, and there are many other ways to express sexual desire and romantic feelings. When faced with erectile dysfunction, you and your partner can both decide to simply ignore it and focus on pleasuring other parts of the body in ways that don't involve an erect penis. 

You and your partner may also decide to find other ways to foster intimacy between the two of you, such as sensual massage or some other shared activity. Playing games, snuggling up and watching movies, even getting dressed and going for an aimless walk can all become ways for you to connect to your partner. The key is to make it clear that the impotence doesn't change your desire to focus on your partner, or receive their attention. The only way to really do this is to talk about it openly, honestly, and with a realistic attitude about educating both of you about the subject of erectile dysfunction. 

Taking an active step to create a new, positive experience out of a potentially damaging situation can strengthen any couple. Communicate openly and make sure both you and your partner are honest about your needs and feelings. A little reassurance and some creative sensuality can keep impotence from harming your relationship with your partner.

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